Why Is This Happening To Me Again - Continued

Last night in the Mindshifters group we listened to another half-hour of the four hour audio recording of Dr. Michael Ryce's lecture titled, "Why Is This Happening To Me Again?".  The thing that struck me during this session was the realization that this work gives me a whole new way to understand, "Keep your thoughts on God!".  As a child being raised in a Roman Catholic home and attending Roman Catholic schools, I was frequently told to keep my thoughts pure and think about God.  As I listened to the  lecture last night, I had the realization that when I think of God as a person, a father, a powerful being, etc., I have a difficult time staying focused on God while going about my daily activities.  However, when I think of God as Love, and as the energy of Love, and realize that I was designed as an energy system to contain that energy, it is much easier to keep my thoughts focused on God.

I can't explain exactly why this hit me so strongly, but it is often the case as I read, or listen to those things which contain powerful material, that when I am exposed to the material time after time, it takes on new levels of meaning, and I gain new insights time and again.  This time it just struck me that I have been working with this material to the extent that I am beginning to think about my energy and my emotions much more often during any given day.  While I am focused on my emotions, I am striving to hold the energy of Love and return to it whenever I find myself feeling anything less than Love.  This is the basis of the work that Dr. Michael Ryce is spreading through his teachings, and it is the goal of all of the tools he provides on his website. 

While listening to the audio last night, it struck me that I was indeed thinking more about (God / Love) throughout the day, than ever before in my life, and in ways that reminded me about the old Catholic admonitions to keep my thoughts focused on God.  It occurred to me that with what I have been learning through the Dr. Ryce audios and videos, I am able to use anything and everything as a trigger to help me focus on Love.  I either focus on the energy of Love and feel the positive effects of that energy, or I recognize that I am feeling something less than Love and start using one of the many tools I have learned to restore myself to the awareness of my source in Love.

During the support group portion of the meeting the members worked on Reality Management worksheets, (www.whyagain.com), and several members realized they were dealing with related issues in their worksheets.  One of the powerful common themes was that of fear.  As we processed the worksheets at the end of the group, the comment was made about how we get triggered to feel fear and then we avoid dealing with whatever triggered that fear.  We discussed how this builds a pattern in our minds which grows stronger every time the pattern is repeated.  Each time I avoid something which triggers fear, my mind has told me that the trigger for the fear is not safe, and that if I move toward it I will not survive it.  Then each time I avoid the trigger for my fear, and I survive, my mind says, "See, you survived!  That means you needed to avoid that fearful trigger, (person, place or thing), in order to survive!  You see, I told you, you would not have survived if you moved toward that terrible thing, or person!"  The fact that I survived is used by my mind to reinforce the conclusion that I needed to avoid the fearful trigger.

As we have learned in this work, anytime I am feeling anything less than Love, I am getting distorted, inaccurate data about what is really happening around me.  My mind will use whatever data it gets to show me what I have told it to show me.  In the example above, when I am triggered to feel fear, the data my mind receives is distorted and it tells me that the trigger is dangerous.  Then my mind goes to work producing evidence that proves to me that the trigger is dangerous.   My mind gathers and creates evidence to feed the conclusion that my trigger is dangerous, and that I will only survive if I avoid it.

This reminds me of a quote by Benjamin Franklin, "I have experienced many horrible difficulties in my life; most of which have never happened."  This quote speaks to me of how I torture myself with fear and procrastination as I dread confronting someone or something, and how the actual confrontation is never as bad as I feared it would be.  This is also related to a quote I mentioned in an earlier post, from The Mirror Theory, "Fear is created by refusing to face the truth about our lives.  But as soon as we do, fear disappears.  It only lives in a soul that refuses to make a decision.  To heal is to walk right into whatever we think is paralyzing us."

I am grateful to all the people who attend these groups and share their energy, stories, and Love.

We come from Love, we are made of Love, we are Love.  Everything else is false.

I Don't Like Myself. I Want To Be Different!

I have run into a pattern recently in working with people.  These people do not like themselves, or something about the way they are as people, and they are angry or resentful about it and want to change.  This has led to numerous discussions about what is needed in order for people to achieve the change they want make in themselves.  Many people are operating under the false impression that they need to be unhappy with the way they are, and make changes in the way they are, in order to be able to love and accept themselves.  The truth is that we need to love and accept ourselves in order to be able to change!

If I am angry and resentful of the way I am, I am rejecting myself, and "beating up on" myself.  If I am rejecting, and "beating up on" myself, I am not seeing myself clearly, or even looking at myself at all.  If I am not seeing myself or looking at myself, how can I work with myself in order to change.

There is a sign hanging in my office which acknowledges this age old wisdom.  It reads, "To be content and growing, embrace yourself as you are, celebrate yourself as you long to be." - Mary Anne Radmacher  The first step here is a necessity.  "Embrace yourself as you are" means to accept yourself.  Once I have accepted myself I have the ability to examine myself closely and truly see myself accurately.  Once I see myself accurately I will be able to work with the different aspects of myself that I like and those I don't like.  

The fundamental truth here is that I cannot work with something I refuse to accept and examine.  I cannot change something that I cannot see clearly.  

If I am willing to face the pain and sadness that are contained in my misperceptions and negative beliefs about myself, I will then be able to see them clearly as the mistakes and falsehoods that they are.  Once I see them clearly my negative assessments of myself, and the negative emotions they generate will fall away and no longer have power over my me.

The truth is  - 

We come from Love, we are made of Love, we are Love.  Everything else is false.

Why Is This Happening To Me Again 4 Hour Audio Part 2

Last night in the Mindshifters group we listened to the second half-hour of the four hour audio lecture titled Why Is This Happening To Me Again?  The thing that struck me about the material this time through was the statement that,  "My mind can only show me the past, until I cancel and dismantle all the old false realities which I have stored in my mind, and my body's energy system by the process of denial and suppression." 

The definition for "the devil" was once again covered and the point was clarified that "the devil" is the past and it lives in the mind of man.  "The devil" in this definition is the process of living in the past which keeps us from living in the mind of God.  The mind of God is the mind of Love.   The only way for  me to get an accurate picture of the world around me is for me to be viewing the world through the filter of Love.

Anytime I am feeling anything other than Love, I am getting distorted data about what is really going on in the world around me.  Anytime I am feeling any form of hostility or fear, this is a gift which is telling me that I am making an error, and that I have moved out of  the mind of Love.

Since the mind of Love is the only thing which can show me an accurate picture of the world around me, I need to stop what I am doing and restore the energy of Love to my mind.  

We would not think of walking around blindfolded, or driving a car while blindfolded, because of the dangers to ourselves and others.  In just the same way, we should make the commitment to stop whatever we are doing when we feel fear or hostility, and use whatever tools we have to dismantle that false reality before doing anything else! For we are just as surely blinded from the truth whenever we are feeling hostility or fear, as we would be if we were wearing a physical blindfold!

Several members discussed their new understanding of the difference between the trigger for an event, and the actual mechanism which causes the event.  In the lecture Dr. Ryce gives the example of the person who comes from a primitive area, with no idea about motors or machinery of any kind.  If you put this person on the side of a river near a bridge, and ask him to figure out what makes the bridge go up, he will watch as a boat comes by and the bridge goes up.   Then the boat goes away and the bridge goes down.  Then another boat comes by and the bridge goes up - the boat goes away and the bridge goes down.  Before long the person concludes that boats make the bridge go up.  

This is a classic example of mistaking the trigger for the actual mechanism.  Those of us who know about mechanics and draw bridges know that there is a person inside the bridge house who sees the boat, and then switches on a motor which drives a series of gears and cables which make the bridge go up.  We also know that nothing about the boat being next to the bridge causes the bridge to go up.  A boat can sit next to the bridge for days without the bridge ever going up, either because there is no one in the bridge house, or because the boat does not have authorization to travel through that part of the river, etc.

Imagine though, that the person who was unaware of any kind of mechanical workings or automation has decided that boats make the bridge go up.  Then you tell that person that you will give them a very large prize or salary if they will keep the bridge from going up, ever again.  That person will probably conclude that they need to change the course of every boat that comes onto that river, to keep it away from the bridge in order to win the prize, or be paid the salary you promised.  Now before you go thinking that this  person is silly, or stupid, think about how many times in our lives we have talked about, wished, or tried to make someone else change their behavior so that we won't have to be angry, sad, hurt, or frustrated!

If indeed we are truly aware of what causes our emotions, we will not be looking at the actions of others for the cause and the cure of our negative experiences.  We will be able to recognize that we create our realities and that we cause the emotions we are feeling at any time, and in every way.

The members of the group worked through two rounds of doing Reality Management Worksheets last night and the process was productive and emotional as it usually is.  The process last night highlighted the difficulty some of us have of defining what the trigger is for a particular worksheet and the difficulty we have at times in clarifying which thoughts cause which emotions.

We come from Love, we are made of Love, we are Love.  Everything else is false.

What Attracts You To Other People?

Dr. Michael Ryce talks about how it is helpful to hear the same material stated in different ways and from different points of view and different disciplines, such as science, psychology, theology, etc., and that this helps us integrate new material.  This post is about how we give up on the true nature of ourselves sometime between the time we are born, and the time we become adults.  Dr. Ryce describes this process in some detail in his lecture titled "From Co-dependence to Inter-dependence", in which he discusses the role of the Power Person in each of our lives.  A Power Person is anyone for whom we "gave up" our conscious connection to our true nature as Love, in order to win the acceptance, and approval of the  Power Person.  Clearly each of us can have more than one Power Person in our lives.  

Identifying who those Power People are, and discovering the patterns we have developed in our behavior in order to try to please them, is a very useful part of the process of returning to the conscious awareness of our true nature as Love.  The more we can identify the things that trigger us to feel anything less than Love, the more we have the opportunity to "Forgive" or "Cancel" and dismantle that part of our stored memories and false realities.

Gregg Braden has written a book titled The Divine Matrix which is all about the invisible energy that connects all of creation.  It is called different things in different cultures, but it all boils down to the realization that we are all connected, and that nothing, and no one, is truly separate from the rest of creation and existence.  In the last quarter of the book, Gregg Braden describes a co-worker he knew who was frequently "falling in love" with people despite the fact that he was happily married.  This person used to "fall in love" with the waitress at lunch, or the bank teller, then come back to the office and obsess about the latest person he was attracted to, and wonder if this person was supposed to be his soul-mate.

In the book Mr. Braden offers the following explanation for why this happens, and why each of us find people to whom we are instantly and powerfully attracted.  He suggests that each of those people are exhibiting traits, characteristics, and skills which we have denied, repressed, or buried in ourselves.  He suggests that we deny, repress, and bury those traits in ourselves in order to fit in with, or be accepted by, different people and groups in our lives.  He suggests that most of the time this is a process we are not consciously aware of, but that some people make conscious choices to "give up", or hide parts of themselves in the pursuit of career, and other goals.

He suggests that those traits, qualities, and skills are not gone, they always remain part of who we are.  We cannot be otherwise.  What is needed is for us to recognize, and willingly accept the challenge of facing the fear of being who we really are.  So why not try this as a challenge?  Why not begin to notice the people you admire, and are attracted to, and let yourself question how that person is displaying a part of your personality, skills, and traits which you have buried, denied or repressed?  Make some mental or even paper and pencil notes about those qualities, and then examine;

 "How would  my life be different if I fully owned and lived from these qualities and traits?", 

 "How do I imagine this would challenge or change some of the key relationships in my life?", 

 "Who in my life, was I trying to please, or appease by hiding this part of myself?"  

The goal, IS THE PROCESS of learning to love and accept yourself as you truly are!

We come from Love, we are made of Love, we are Love.  Everything else is false.

Why Is This Happening To Me Again? 4 Hour Audio

Last night the Mindshifters group listened  to the first part of a 4 hour audio version of Dr. Michael Ryce's lecture titled; Why Is This Happening To Me Again?  We decided to listen to the audio version because it is more detailed than the two hour video lecture of the same name, and in it Dr. Ryce takes more time explaining the underlying reasons for why our emotional system works the way it does.  In this version the first thing that stuck out for me was the comment about Blockage of Personal Error, which is a condition from which we all suffer.  The greatest threat to our ability to see the truth in any situation is our Blockage of Personal Error.  Blockage of Personal Error is the direct result of our denying our creator-ship.   For if we accept that we are creating our internal reality, and all of our emotions, and all of our reactions, then we will have nothing to blame on others, and nothing to blame on our circumstances. 

As I explained this to a friend she commented that this was "very deep".  That shocked me because it seemed completely obvious and crystal clear.  Then I realized that the only reason it seems completely obvious to me is that I have listened to this 4 hour lecture at least nine different times over the last three years.  Then I realized that this is the first time this statement jumped out at me as being critically important.  So why is that?  What happened the first eight times I heard this lecture to block me from understanding or even hearing this statement?  Or what happened during the first eight times I listened to this lecture which allowed me to hear this statement and feel its importance, the ninth time I heard the lecture?

This is what Dr. Ryce calls the process of "building brain cells", for understanding new concepts.  Another way to talk about it is the building of a framework for understanding new ideas and experiences.  If someone has never tasted wine before and a wine expert starts talking to them about a wine being "dry", or "fruity", the person will have no idea what is being talked about.  But if the person is given a taste of several different "dry" wines, and told that these are "dry", and then given a taste of several different "fruity" wines and told that these are "fruity", then the person will have some basis for comparing other wines they may taste in the future.  Then this person will be able to understand and converse with other people about these basic qualities of wine. 

So, last night a new aspect of the lecture jumped out at me and made perfect sense.  If I create all my own internal realities and I create all of my reactions to people and things around me, then I have no reason to be angry at someone else.  If I am angry at someone else, I am in Blockage of Personal  Error, and I am actively denying the fact that I am the creator of my experience!  Simple!  Logical! Blatantly obvious! So why didn't I see this so clearly until last night, the ninth time I heard the simple, logical, blatantly obvious statement?  The answer is to be found in the decades of personal, family and social conditioning which has taught me that other people are responsible for hurting my feelings, and making me angry and making me feel guilty, etc.

It is shocking at times to realize how much I still function from the position of Blockage of Personal Power, and how much I actively deny my creator-ship!

I am beginning to realize at a whole new level how my goal is to love myself despite my imperfections, whether they are physical, intellectual, or emotional.  This is captured in one of my favorite quotes from the book, The Mirror Theory, 

"...the ultimate love is appreciation of self.  Look around you.  God is living the ultimate wherever you see people loving their lives.  Once you tap into that love, you want to expand it.  No permanent state exists however, where you wouldn't want to reach for more.  God is a light that is forever growing in breadth and depth.  But then how can I reach perfection if it's always in a state of flux? - For that very reason.  Perfection is simply the love you find in THE EVERY MOMENT you exist.  There is no other perfect to find."

We come from Love, we are made of Love, we are Love.  Everything else is false.